How I overcame my social anxiety?

May 22, 2021

A long story short, I had social anxiety until 2020. In my childhood, I was a much quiet person; most of the people appreciated my quietness. I did not participate in any extra curriculum activities in school. When I started to work, social anxiety was a problem in performance evaluation and promotion. In some situations, I was thinking about why I did not get promoted and others got promoted, then I could not take time to think about that because of workload.
On 20th March 2020, curfew was imposed by the government for 3 months due to COVID 19 global pandemic, I had some alone time to find a solution to every question I had in my mind. I was thinking about myself, watching some YouTube videos, found a lot of ways to get rid of my social anxiety, and practised. I was ended up with a 3-way technique for getting rid of social anxiety.



First thing first, some of us don’t know we have social anxiety. It can be very easy to confuse shyness and social anxiety. While shyness is a personality trait, social anxiety is a mental illness. If you have any of the following signs (I don’t want to make you scared by using the term “symptoms”), you have social anxiety.

  1. You have physical symptoms - you feel Heart palpitations, sweaty palm, shortness of breath, lightheadedness, and trembling when you're in social situations, these are the signs of social anxiety. I felt Heart palpitations, shortness of breath, and trembling in every social situation when I had social anxiety.
  2. You avoid social situations - your social anxiety leads you to avoid social situations or get-together. You decline invitations, refuse to speak in front of people, and you would rather sit in the corner to avoid being noticed and mingle with anyone else. When I had social anxiety, I refused to participate in weddings, festivals, and other family functions.
  3. you are overanalyzing everything - Social anxiety can make you obsess over your social interactions. You may spend a lot of time and energy analyzing other people's facial expressions, body language, and tone of voice to see if they really mean what they're saying or not. In some situations, I was overthinking to convey my ideas at office meetings and missed communicating those ideas.
  4. It interferes with your performance - Social anxiety can impact your performance in many ways, with the constant fear of people's judgments. In some situations, I was afraid to raise my hand, even if I knew the answer at school and I did not pitch my idea at office meetings, even if I had ideas.
  5. You are always self-conscious - One aspect of social anxiety is the extreme fear of being judged. When I had social anxiety, I constantly worried about the way I look or act and what others think of me. My greatest fear was of embarrassing myself in front of others.
  6. It doesn’t go away with familiarity - you always experience fear distress and embarrassment whenever you're around other people. Doesn't matter if it's your parents, siblings, or best friend. You always feel uneasy and stressed unless you're alone. In this situation, I was better and I was relaxed with people close to me
  7. Your anxiety feels out of head - There are times when it's normal to feel shy or nervous around other people, for example when you move to a new school or have to perform in front of an audience. But social anxiety is irrational and unwarranted. You may feel distressed about things as simple as making eye contact with someone, using public transportation, or eating in front of other people. What I did when I had social anxiety is, walking fast on crowded roads.
  8. It affects your relationships - having social anxiety can complicate your relationships. If you are unpleasant and uneasy around people. No one wants to have a friendship with you. Actually, I don’t have any close friends until I realized I had social anxiety.

I am going to share 3 way-technique that I used to get rid of social anxiety and actually, social anxiety created more issue in my life and this is a very personal blog to me.

Accept it 

You have to accept it you are suffering from social anxiety. If you are going through the above sign of social anxiety, you can realize that how you are feeling in a social situation. The first thing I did after got to know the sign of social anxiety, I visited crowded places and get together and realized how I felt.


Breathe

Oxygen is one of the fastest ways for us to change the way we feel and take conscious control. Every time you take a deep breath in, imagine you are breathing in all positivity and every time you take a deep breath out, imagine you are breathing out all negativity. Every time I am engaging in a social situation, I am taking a deep breath.


Reframe

When you feel really anxious you need to begin to reframe what it means to you. When you are feeling anxious to meet people, you need to reframe that I am so excited to go meet those people. I did what I refused to do due to social anxiety and reframed myself.

Once you begin to take control and reframe your social anxiety, you will realize inside that you are blessed. Your life never is the same again.


Please share this blog with your friends who have social anxiety. It will be useful to them.


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